COPING WITH CRISIS AND STRESS IN THE FAMILY

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Do not allow a crisis to go to waste, was a quote from Pastor Poju Oyemade.

Crisis in family life is real and not fabricated by the media. It can be induced or naturally inflicted by somebody in the family, friends or relatives as the case may be.

Crisis is a situation that brings about changes in our normal patterns of behavior. Crises in family basically change the structure of things at home that will require a new set of response to the stressor. Crises could be external in the form of hurricane, downsizing, etc or internal such as infidelity, the lost of a love one.

While stress is the reaction of the body to unusual demands which could be physical, environmental or interpersonal. Stress often comes with tension, high blood pressure, irritability, depression, etc.

Stress and Crisis are part of a family life and we cannot avoid it but learn how to manage it on a daily basis. To some people these terms is seen as “normal events”.

On the 7th of August 2017, my family and I were hit by a major crisis that we weren’t prepared for. On that fateful day, my dad was involved in a ghastly motor accident which resulted in a fracture on his left humerus, left femur and fibula.

The first day in the hospital was so stressful for everybody in the family and most especially on me the eldest in the family. I was involved in information gathering with several calls coming from family and friends on that very day but with high degree of stress.

I spent 2 days sleeping out in the hospital, attending to several needs coming from the hospital, with less sleep.

Days later my father regains consciousness but with severe injuries all over his body.

Six weeks down the line, a successful operation was carried out on him but the stress level gradually increased on every one of us.

I noticed that as days goes by, I gradually became aggressive to people around me all because of the stress that was placed on me.

The whole process was stressful because my father was so demanding, and given to low self – esteem, self- centeredness and also had entitlement mentality. This I noticed from him as the days go by.

During this period I was unable to cope with my writing business and had to let go of some writing jobs from some clients within that space of time. I was totally destabilized and exhausted mentally, emotionally, physically and even spiritually.

As weeks go by, the ache in my body gradually increases together with my body temperature.   Within this period I made a visit to another hospital twice in order to attend to my own health.

The stress level gradually increases on a daily basis not until; I have to master the whole process.

I finally came to the realization that I have a greater stake in making myself happy and productive each passing day even though the stress is staring boldly at my face.

I have to accept things the way it is and then look for palliative that can cushion the stress on me and the family.

Weeks later, I kicked off with my writing business, made the desired positive mental switch and have to accept people the way they are and the whole situation.

The tendency to get irritated and aggressive gradually creeps away and my joy level was high each passing day.

Nobody ever prepare for crises but when it comes, be bold to handle the challenges because it will make you a stronger person.

 

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